Work out mum.

I am currently trying to get fit. With 2 kids at home this has not been easy. So I decided to try the 30 day shred. I can say I do feel fitter but I am only on level 1. Have watched level 2 I already feel pain without doing it. I am still waiting for this extra energy people talk about but it has not come. This could be to bad sleep. But there has been another side effect I did not see. That is my son increasing his imaginary play. He now stops watching his movie to go and play with his Legos. My boy would watch stuff on Netflix forever if he got his way and after I have had no sleep he gets more than I would like. So him choosing to do something else while I work out is an add motivational bonus.

Invisible

My son has 100 invisible friends. They come with us everywhere in various numbers. Stinky recently made an appearance. He needed a bath although we couldn't smell him because he was invisible and he has an invisible smell. So I asked my son if he would give invisible stinky an invisible bath. He replied no because he has no invisible water. My son then made a trip to the invisible store to buy some invisible water.
Everyone who meets my son meets one or more of his invisible friends. We just need to be careful we don't sit on them or leave them outside.

Dreamers

When we are little we are great dreamers. My son currently wants to be a Monster Truck driver. He has also wanted to be a train driver and a fire fighter. When I was little I wanted to work with animals. As I grew that stayed with me and I have over my life volunteered at pet shelters and riding schools and also had paying work too at kennels and barns. Even the the US I spent a happy time at a horse rescue. Horses are my passion and they are my dream still. But no longer as a job but as a past time. I think as adults dreams can affect our lives greatly. Hanging on to that childhood dream for too long stops us dreaming new dreams. Being so focused on getting that dream means that we miss today. Not dreaming at all can mean we have no goals and feel trapped. At times I have hit all areas of these dreams and those impacts.

I still dream of owning my own horse property and having several horses on it. Some mine, some rescue and some to board. But that is a dream for when I don't have two young children at home fighting for my attention. Now my dream is of a nice house and good schools for my kids to go to. I dream that we can regularly travel abroad to see family. All of these dreams are possible but some change and some need to go and some a truly dreams for that place between awake and asleep where anything is possible. I will never be a world class equestrian but I can dream.

So I have decided to encourage my kids to dream but to teach them when it is time to let go. Not too soon and not too late. And to make sure that their dreams encourage them to fly.

New Year

Happy New Year. As I gently rock my baby in her bouncer I am amazed that she is 6 months old. She still doesn't sleep well and the reflux is a reoccurring issue but I am blessed. My little surprise has slipped into our life so easily I cannot remember it without her. Sure I would love more sleep and be able to leave the house without feeling as though I am moving house. But progress is being made, she is asleep by 9 and so I get a couple of golden child free hours before bed. She can also now sit by herself and play with her toys. I know that time will fly by and that I need to remember these moments. 2012 was an amazing year. At times I wanted to pull out my hair as I tried to teach, write essays and be pregnant but I would not swap it for the world.

A mission of memories.

I have decided in this Christmas season it is a time for memories. I want to create moments that fuse together into a happy childhood for my children. My son is now getting to an age where he can remember things. With an infant I am aware that I am limited. But I want to create memories and maybe traditions also.

So this year I decided to make cards with my four year old. In the past I have created things that take time and I get upset when they fail or look horrible. So this year I went simple. I bought some foam stickers in a Christmas theme and used some blank cards. We then spent a happy hour sticking stickers and creating pictures with them. On thanksgiving weekend while everyone was out grabbing deals we made salt dough ornaments. My son had a great afternoon painting them and then the next day sticking sparkle on them. I hope that we can try and do this every year.

I have realized that I want to also be intentional when it is not just Christmas. But for that things need to be simple and quick. I have tried trips to the library which is easy, close and free. There are then trips to the zoo. They take more planning but can be great fun. But for those days of little sleep I have found puzzle time a good thing to do. It can be done at any point my little girl naps. The other thing is making cakes. Box cakes are easy and quick. It is time together and if fun to lick the bowl and then eat the cake. All of these things are easy for me to do. They are simple but can be come harder with adding of extra tasks etc as my children go.

Through all of this I have learned that something is better than nothing. Quick is great and simple is wonderful. This is something I can do easily. I just need to be intentional and remember that tv has its place but so does baking cakes, puzzle time. All of these together make a great childhood.

Motherhood

I know there was a time before little miss and even a time before my medium guy (he told us that he is no longer little but medium). But it hardly seems real. I have the occasional memory of life before kids, of a freedom to go out when I want, to not have to plan about going out for dinner or even going to the grocery store. There then are also the faint memories of life with just one child, where even then you could pop out to the store without to much worry. But now with a bouncing four year old and an infant life is planned around sleep (or lack of), feedings and diaper changes. It is a challenge of time given to the all demanding infant and the needs if a four year old.


My little miss has been with us for nearly 5 months. She wants to be in on all the action, to watch what her big brother is doing. She can briefly sit by herself until the turn of a head or that sneeze sends her toppling towards the floor. She watches every mouth full of food wanting to try anything and everything whether she should or not. In just 5 months she has placed herself in our family and our hearts to where I can no longer imagine our family without her. Her brother enjoys talking for her and discussing what foods to eat and whether mummy is silly.
In the middle of the night when I am getting up for the 4th time I do long for sleep. But the joy of a second child is that as long as the days and the weeks seem I know that this time will pass.

All I need now is to get 6 hours of sleep in one go and maybe I can feel human again. That is my Christmas wish that my little miss will sleep and sleep well on a regular basis.

The Emotions of a Mother

I am amazed how much time has gone since my little girl was born. I have found that now as a mother of two my emotions have more than doubled. The love for my kids has grown more than ever. However the day to day emotions have surprised me. I lurch from success, to living to just basic survival. As I walk the path of motherhood I find some days I am embracing memories as we make Christmas decorations, create pinecone turkeys and go to the zoo. There are other days where we just want to make it to bedtime without us falling apart. Sleep has become short and at times patience is shorter. But through it all I want my children to remember the love and the fun. To grow up and talk about the salt dough decorations we made for family and friends, the Christmas cards, trips to the zoo as well as the cuddles on the sofa, stories read and movies watch.