Friday, July 1, 2011

Summer thoughts.

The summer has arrived in our household and with it this year has come trips to see the family on both sides. Currently we are in England visiting with my family. The more I am here the more I think about life back in the US and question is it home? I have also been reflecting on the situations we have focused on this year and the conclusions I have come to.

Since being here in the UK I have come to realise that this is a country that just makes more sense to me than the US ever will. I went to ASDA the other day and my mum found it very amusing how at every turn I commented on things like crisps, cakes, chocolates, biscuits and anything that I cannot find in the US which buy the time we had finished felt like the whole store. I may have lived in the US for over 6 years but I just find that I fit in here in the UK better. The people look like me. To some that statement sounds weird as how can a white woman not fit in in the US, but there is just something about American women that is not like UK women. I can't quite place my finger on it but I feel more at home in my skin this side of the water. I confess I do wonder whether I will ever have the feeling about the US as I do about the UK. I also wonder as my little boy runs around playing with Grandma and Granddad and his cousins whether he will grow into having a fondness for the UK or whether he will look to the US for this. I hope for him that he can look to the US and the UK and Ghana as home.

I know that by the end of this summer my little boy will be a very spoiled little boy. We have taken him to the beach and it was typical british weather in the high 60s. My little boy however had a blast running about and squashing any sand castle attempt made by me or my dad. It is through this that I realised I want to create memories. Memories of fun and laughter, of family. Being so far away from family means the time we get together is precious. I long to come home to England but I have realised that this is not just about it being in the country it is because of the memories. The memories of dad writing Dad is handsome on the beach and me either rubbing it out or writing NOT. It is about the walks and the laughs in the local parks that happen to be near old historical houses. It is about eating fish and chips after a fun day out and catching up with the weeks, months or years news. It is about that feeling you have when you go somewhere and it just gives you that happy feeling. I may not remember the exact memory but I know I was happy whether it was running through the rain or picnics near the lake. I hope that I am able to give this precious gift to my son. I want him to feel this about the US, UK and Ghana, memories and happiness. I know that too give this to my son I need to make sure that I stop and smell the roses. Picnics and time at the beach are not expensive they just take time. I need to make sure that I take the time to create the memories.

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