The working mum.

I hate the phrase working mum. For one I don't know a mother who does not work. When I work outside the home it is someone's job to look after my children. I pay them to wipe there noses, feed them, change their diaper and pick them up. So if I am at home I am working too. I also dislike the phrase working mother because often it gives the impression that I don't see my kids and I am inactive in their lives due to working outside of the home. 

So many assumptions are made towards parents often focused at the mother. The worst culprits are often mothers. We think things like "well if that was my child I would ...... ( fill in the blank). As parents we judge other parents because in our mind what they are doing is crazy. Now we could be right in a sense if I decided to do something with the type of person that I am and the situation I am in, of no family near by it probably is. But those parents aren't me. We parents have some strong opinions on how we raise our children to even how many everyone should have. I have two children at one point I wasn't sure if I would have more. People where horrified that I would not have at least two. Being an only child I was a little offended. I can say the thought of having more than two gives me the shakes. So when others say they want more my first thought is 'You're mad!!' But that is because I place myself as having more. But when I often step back at look at them as they are it makes sense. 

I am a mother who works away from home. I try hard to balance time at work with me time, kid time, hubby time, family time, and running house. I believe that this is the right thing for my family. I have thought about the pluses, the minuses and the not sure. I have prayed about it and felt this was the path to go. At the end of the day as a mum I want what is best for my children. Everyday is filled with questions and I have to give an answer. There is always a hot topic as your kids grow it starts from the moment they exist. Cry it out or not? Organic? Stay at home? Daycare? Nanny? Home school? Public school? And so it goes on. For all those big things I pray we got it right for us. I know something will be wrong so I pray to God knowing he is bigger than all of this and can make it right.

I pray most of all that my children know I love them. That they remember the fun times. I pray the grow up to be people with compassion, love, kindness and forgiveness in their hearts. That they will be successful however it turns out. 

Summer thoughts.

The summer has arrived in our household and with it this year has come trips to see the family on both sides. Currently we are in England visiting with my family. The more I am here the more I think about life back in the US and question is it home? I have also been reflecting on the situations we have focused on this year and the conclusions I have come to.

Since being here in the UK I have come to realise that this is a country that just makes more sense to me than the US ever will. I went to ASDA the other day and my mum found it very amusing how at every turn I commented on things like crisps, cakes, chocolates, biscuits and anything that I cannot find in the US which buy the time we had finished felt like the whole store. I may have lived in the US for over 6 years but I just find that I fit in here in the UK better. The people look like me. To some that statement sounds weird as how can a white woman not fit in in the US, but there is just something about American women that is not like UK women. I can't quite place my finger on it but I feel more at home in my skin this side of the water. I confess I do wonder whether I will ever have the feeling about the US as I do about the UK. I also wonder as my little boy runs around playing with Grandma and Granddad and his cousins whether he will grow into having a fondness for the UK or whether he will look to the US for this. I hope for him that he can look to the US and the UK and Ghana as home.

I know that by the end of this summer my little boy will be a very spoiled little boy. We have taken him to the beach and it was typical british weather in the high 60s. My little boy however had a blast running about and squashing any sand castle attempt made by me or my dad. It is through this that I realised I want to create memories. Memories of fun and laughter, of family. Being so far away from family means the time we get together is precious. I long to come home to England but I have realised that this is not just about it being in the country it is because of the memories. The memories of dad writing Dad is handsome on the beach and me either rubbing it out or writing NOT. It is about the walks and the laughs in the local parks that happen to be near old historical houses. It is about eating fish and chips after a fun day out and catching up with the weeks, months or years news. It is about that feeling you have when you go somewhere and it just gives you that happy feeling. I may not remember the exact memory but I know I was happy whether it was running through the rain or picnics near the lake. I hope that I am able to give this precious gift to my son. I want him to feel this about the US, UK and Ghana, memories and happiness. I know that too give this to my son I need to make sure that I stop and smell the roses. Picnics and time at the beach are not expensive they just take time. I need to make sure that I take the time to create the memories.

Snow

As a teacher I am finding a new meaning to the possibility of snow. While wondering I found this rather great teachers prayer for snow and felt I just had to post it

A Teacher's Prayer For Snow

Oh, Lord, Let it snow.
Let it drift and let it blow.
In the morning, no real fuss,
Just enough to stop the bus.

Enough to make the County say:
"There will be no school today."
Let the radio report: "Snow is deep!"
And I'll roll over for more sleep.

Then later on, say maybe ten,
I'll turn the radio on again.
Just in time to hear them say:
"It's strange: the snow has gone away!"

And then I'll know you made it stop,
So I can go to the mall and shop.
Please Lord, just hear my plea,
And make it snow for the kids and me!

Amen
Author Unknown

When did that happen?

Although many of my friends in the US say that I have a British accent anyone back in the UK would say well I guess it might still be there but it is hiding a little. So when did it happen that I became American or has it not happened yet. In someways I have had to adapt to the new culture I am in. There is no use me asking for a petrol station as all I seem to get is blank stares, so gas is what I now put in my car. And since I had my child in the US he is in diapers rather than nappies and sleep in a crib rather than a cot. But also I have noticed that my way of living has become more like the American. I drive everywhere, granted there are several times during the year that walking would just not work as either it is to cold or to hot and humid, but still why don't I walk on the days I can. The other thing I realised the other day was that I am always using my drier. Now I know that this is a very useful thing to have as, as I stated before drying outside in the cold or humid air doesn't not really help clothes dry, turn them into frozen shirts or even damper jeans depending on the weather yes. But again on those nice days when it is warm with a slight breeze why oh why am I using the drier. I used to love curling up in bed on fresh sheets, the ones that had flapped about outside. I am thinking I might just find that British person who seems to be berried somewhere and get a washing line. I guess also I am starting to view myself as I once viewed Americans as energy, petrol guzzling people without a care. Now before all my friends shot me down I do know this to be different. But still when am I using an item like a drier and a car because it is there or because I need to?